In all fairness

So men need not be tall dark and handsome. Well, no longer. It is decided that they should be fair complexioned or else they will have to spend their lives hiding behind bushes stealing women’s fairness creams or playing insignificant doubles to popular (read fair) actors. Now, for decades to come young boys will grow up applying generous volumes of fairness creams on their faces thinking that life would be fair to them only if they look fair.
There can be no debates on this matter. After all, it’s the country’s leading fairness cream company that has taken the decision. It took the same decision for women several decades ago. It knew that women needed to become the fairer sex, rather literally, and flashed this well-intentioned noble message across all publications and television.
Predictably, the cream did well. Well, with most girls being differentiated in their homes itself owing to their skin colour, the fairness cream only strengthened the notion. Fairer is better, they said. Innumerable women agreed.
It became a leading product in the fairness creams segment but still wanted to do better. So, it had to come up with brighter ideas to market itself better. The ideas largely revolved around the sad lives of dark or not so fair women. They didn’t get jobs nor did they get men. They were sniggered at by prospective grooms or their families and they were, well, generally losers. Their parents were sad people too and lived in badly painted houses and cried about them not having a son until the fairness cream changed their lives along with the colour of their daughter’s skin who instantly gets a job and takes her parents to a five-star hotel for coffee! I cried for the family, with joy of course!
Gradually, the dark-complexioned girls discovered that talent was not enough. They needed fair skin to realize their dreams like giving cricket commentary.
Now, it’s the turn of men to be told how their lives would change if they used the cream that made so many women successful. Oh stop studying guys. All you need is a peaches n cream complexion to rule the world with a fair babe by your side. And stop idolizing actors like Ajay Devgan, so what if he is extremely talented. Put up posters of the fair-skinned Dino Morea.
It’s only fair, right?